Worries…

I was trying to compose something about my holiday in Indonesia, and I did try hard. But somehow nothing came out right.

It was definitely an exciting holiday. I remember us being so enthusiastic — preparing, packing up, getting my husband proper vaccination and malaria pills. Even with my husband personal feelings towards flying, the flight wasn’t too bad — I admit having Deadpool on the in flight entertainment did help a lot in distracting my husband from thinking about flying.

of course having red wine on our aeroplane meal helped too...

of course having red wine on our aeroplane meal helped too…

I remember the train journey and how we ended up exceedingly tired because of the delay — the engine breakdown. I remember the party, and my sisters and my brother. And my parents who were so happy about having the complete set of family members in one room — something that is rarely happen recently due to us being away from home.

But when I tried to compose them to a story. It just don’t come out right.

Once I set my feet at Norwich, the excitement is gone. The holiday feelings. The sense of adventure. They’re just gone and replaced by worries. Lots of them.

view from the train, just when the dawn broke...

view from the train, just when the dawn broke…

Since I have been shouted at on the street few days before I left for Indonesia, I could no longer feel safe. After Brexit, I could no longer feel at home, nor feel welcome as a guest in this country. My husband who is a white British born and bred tried so hard to convince me otherwise, but with so many horrible news lately… it is hard not to think about the worst.

Really.

It made me think, is it possible that I could be happier if we move somewhere else?

x ❤ x

 

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14 thoughts on “Worries…

  1. I am so sorry for what you went through. I cannot imagine what it feels like, only that I feel it isn’t right. I am hurt knowing that people can be so cruel. But I do believe that far more people are kind and loving. So shrug it off and feel the warm embrace of caring people around you. I’m sending you big hugs ((()))

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    • Thank you Ginny. You’re right, there are so many more lovely people here, and I try not to dwell on this one bad apple 🙂 hugs ❤ ❤

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  2. Hey! I am envious that you went to Indonesia for a holiday, I really want to go asap! I hope this can comfort you even in the slightest of ways… I live in London and have been verbally abused quite a few times in the last few yrs, (I wear a headscarf so it’s hard to escape it really). It’s kinda sad because I was born and bred in London, and its where home is for me, but sometimes I feel like an outsider or an alien. However, most people aren’t like this, the ignorant haters that lash out are a minority, so please don’t be anxious or worry too much! It’s really saddening to hear you had to go through something like this, but the best thing to do is ignore it and laugh it off (sounds like a crazy idea) but this helps me, and I tell people about it as well.

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    • I am so sooo sorry to hear what you had to go through. It is difficult to feel unwanted somewhere you call home. I home this will pass and everything will be better soon… Lots of hugs ❤ and thank you for your support. I really appreciate it xx

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    • Thank you… My husband is a wonderful person and has been trying to help me with this negative feeling. Britain is a wonderful place, and I have met a lot of lovely people. It was quite traumatic, but I still love this place 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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